Autumn is upon us. My favorite time of year. Have I been enjoying myself? Not hardly. The weather has been a disaster, still warm enough often to need the air conditioner to tolerate it. But here we are the day before Halloween. All Hallow Eve’s… eve if you will. My favorite holiday from my favorite season.

I am not enjoying that either. No decorations have been put out. Hardly any horror movies have been watched. Little candy (I can’t say none) purchased. A massive amount of sleeping and allergy medications consumed in their stead. Today I feel tired and confused. My head is twitching as if I haven’t slept in days while the opposite is true. My forehead feels warm and I find myself wanting to crawl into a dark corner and… what? Cease for the time being? Hibernate until my body can come to grips with whatever it is that has been haunting me these past few weeks filling my tiresome days with fitful coughing and strange, scratchy, almost modern Batman-esque vocal sound effects?

I don’t want to be Batman.

I don’t even like Batman.

The air smells immaculate this evening. There’s still a bit too much warmth in it but I can smell the soil and can see the fallen leaves scattered about the front and back porches. I still have hope of enjoying myself, even if only fleetingly, before the cold icy grasp of winter draws across the land.

Who am I kidding? The way the weather has been acting this year it’ll be 95 degrees on Thanksgiving! God do I hate California. And allergies. Specifically my allergies. Of which I am allergic to.

HISTAMINE!!!!!! FROM HELL’S HEART I FLONASE AT THEE!!!!!

Why does South Park suck so much all of a sudden anyway?

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